Red Sox Give Twins a Sound Thrashing
The weekend series between the Red Sox and Twins was really not a fair fight. It was the Gentleman Masher “basting the turkey” of his …
The Xander Bogaerts Revenge Tour Hits Minnesota
Watching Xander Bogaerts tear through opposing pitchers like a knife through rare roast beef, it’s almost improbable to remember that just a couple years ago …
Everything That’s Wrong With The Red Sox In One Convenient Late-Night Game
I had the pleasure of chatting with Tony Mazz on the Baseball Reporters this evening. He was asking who is to blame for last night’s …
Spend the Off-Day Watching David Ortiz Crush Pinatas
The good folks at Jet Blue have imagined a post-retirement career for David Ortiz that involves… well, just check the video below and see for …
The Comeback That Almost Was
Man, that win would have meant so much. The Red Sox would have remained in first and taken two-out-of-three from the Jays. Instead, we’re looking …
Red Sox Ownership Approves of this Win
I was out and about yesterday, which is a clever way of saying “got drunk and pretty much lost all sense of time” so I …
No Pitching, No Hit Streak and Everything Sucks
Last night was the type of night we had in mind when we signed David Price. Coming off two miserable losses in Baltimore. Dropping sole …
Pitching, Not Really Our Thing
Going into tonight’s series finale against Baltimore, the Red Sox had been outscored 45-43 in the last seven games. With all the talk of the …
Joe Kelly and Clay Buchholz Join Forces to Ruin My Evening
Apparently not content to let Clay Buchholz and Joe Kelly shit on our dreams individually, the stars (and Red Sox management) aligned to have both …
Mookiepalooza: Mookie Betts Becomes Legend, Owns Camden Yards
As if we needed more proof that there’s a strong 2013 vibe coming off this Red Sox team, tonight’s trouncing of the Orioles offered a …
You Can’t Stop Time, Rock and Roll or Steven Wright
In the first game of what I’ve boldly and drunkenly described as the most important series of the season thus far, the Red Sox drew …
Red Sox vs. Orioles in the Battle for the Planet of First Place
We’ve just hit Memorial Day weekend, so it’s difficult to sit here and say that this four game set in Baltimore is gonna make or …
The Only Bright Spot from Yesterday’s Red Sox Game
I don’t wanna talk about Craig Kimbrel or any of our relievers. The only takeaways I have interest in are as follows: 1. David Ortiz …
Livers Rejoice! Clay Buchholz Headed to the Bullpen
In the wake of Thursday night’s loss, I predicted a phantom DL stint for Clay Buchholz. Turns out, I was wrong. The Sox announced earlier …
Jackie’s Streak, Our Patience with Clay and Other Things that Ended Last Night
Yes, I should have typed a game recap last night. But I was too damn tired after watching Clay stumble through yet another start, blowing …
From Suckboats to Duckboats: The 2016 Red Sox
Alright, I’m probably getting ahead of myself. But every night this Red Sox team pulls something out of its collective ass that gets me thinking …
I Don’t Know How To Win!
I don’t think the Toronto Raptors are going to win the series because they need to win one in Cleveland, and we all know the …
Wouldja Please Make David Ortiz an Offer He Can’t Refuse and End This “Retirement” BS
For more than a decade, whenever hope seemed lost or we needed some kind of magic at the zero hour, David Ortiz has been the …
Jackie Bradley Jr.’s Hitting Streak Will Probably Go On Forever
I’m sorry if I just jinxed him with that headline, but I am embracing JBJ mania with both hands. After two seasons in the cellar …
It’s Beginning to Look a Lot Like 2013
Disclaimer: I am not saying the Red Sox are a lock to win the World Series in 2016, so save your venom. Remember when the …
Rusney Castillo is the Future of the Red Sox, According to this Garbage Can
You heard it here, folks. On this Brookline Ave. garbage can. Rusney Castillo is our future. And it’s the garbage can right across from the …
Shirtless Hanley Ramirez Interrupts Jackie Bradley Jr Interview and I Can’t Believe I’m Typing This, Either
Full disclosure: for much of last year, I wanted Hanley Ramirez gone. Thought he was nothing more than an overpaid distraction who would never give …
Guerin Austin’s Dress Was the Real Hero of the Game
Nuff said. I just hope Ms. Austin’s bosses at NESN gave her a dry-cleaning stipend. Nonetheless, Guerin was certainly a good sport about it. I'm …
For the 8,375th Time, David Ortiz Saves the Day
Technically, my math may be off. I’m sure he’s actually saved the day a million times. But regardless of the final count, today we got …
Red Sox Win Fifth Straight, Score 51 Runs in Four Games, Begin Accepting Opponents’ Letters of Surrender
At what point is it too much? At what point is it just so embarrassing for opposing teams to get their asses whipped by the …
Red Sox Officially Unstoppable, Jackie Bradley Jr. Knocks in 2,000 Runs
Alright, that headline is utter nonsense. Jackie didn’t knock in 2,000 runs over this three-game set with the A’s. He knocked in 13. But, man, …
Red Sox One Win Closer to the World Series Parade
Here’s the thing. With Papi out of the line-up last night and someone named Sean O’Sullivan on the hill, I figured that even against the …
Kulpa is Not the Red Sox’ Biggest Problem!
Come on, Red Sox Nation, get your shit together. Yes, Ron Kulpa is a giant ass-hat who thinks he’s bigger than the game. And yes, …
Ron Kulpa, Asshole Ump, Puts Pride Before Job, Robs Red Sox
In baseball, there is nothing more infuriating than an umpire’s shitty call costing your team the game. If the Red Sox have to take a …
Clay-Nation
Who among us is ready to drink the Clay Buchholz Kool-Aid? Not me. He can take his 5.71-ERA ass and go pitch somewhere else. My …
Just Big Papi being Big Papi
Just when you think David Ortiz couldn’t make the Big Papi legend any larger, he does something like this. My allergies really started acting up reading …
Rick Porcello Is Currently The Red Sox’ Ace and Other Things I Never Thought I’d Say
For some time now, I’ve suspected Rick Porcello of being something of a double agent. Someone who secretly hates the Boston Red Sox and has …
Kimbrel chokes = bedtime
I’ll catch the winner of this one when I wake up. Kimbrel’s meatball right down the middle to Rasmus was all I needed to hit …
Xander Bogaerts, the Human Target?
Clay Buchholz serving up a grand slam and Roenis Elias coming out for the ninth inning of Saturday’s game notwithstanding, the scariest moment thus far …