Wakefield Standard Time
Just when I thought I’d rather drink the sweat off a gorilla’s nutsack than see another Tim Wakefield start, the guy comes through in a …
Change of Scenery
So what did you do this weekend?Well, instead of watching the Sox drop another to Chicago, I did my part for the George Lucas Retirement …
Dear Major League Baseball
Screw you. Seriously, a 2:20pm start for today’s earth-crunching, baseball-lover’s wet dream of a match-up between the Red Sox and Cubs? I know it’s Wrigley …
Control Freak
He may be old. He may be fat. But the dude throws strikes. David Wells went 8 strong innings, shutting out the Cardinals, and walking …
Look Sharp. Please.
Remember how you felt after Game Seven of the 2003 ALCS? Throat all knotted up. Dry heaves at the office. Senses dulled. Blood heated. Lungs …
A Small Silver Lining
The night could have been perfect. The 2004 World Series rematch. Edgar Renteria returning to the field where his last at bat ended that very …
To My Godson Thaddeus on His Graduation from Pre-School
Dearest Thaddeus. This is Red, the man your parents, for some inexplicable reason, have entrusted to guide you through this life if, God help us, …
Same Old Song And Dance
Anyone care to guess what the Red Sox record for the last 30 days is? If you guessed .500, well take your prize, Jaspar. The …
Gotta Be the Shoes!
Johnny Damon, I’m sorry I ever doubted you. Sorry I ever thought that your wedding and book signings and TV appearances and banjo tour of …
You Woke Up My Neighborhood
Anything can happen. That was the goddam mission statement of the 2004 Red Sox season. One minute we’re watching our boys go down three games …
Ghosts of Seasons Past
Is it just me or is this season becoming hauntingly reminiscent of last year? Not that it turned out so bad in the end, but …
We’ll Drink to That
Four innings deep and it looked like a replay of Monday night’s game. Nothing doing offensively, with each successive Sox at-bat about as alluring as …
The Day After
Our boy Brandon on the business end of an uncharacteristic shelling. The bats that came to life in New York lulled back to sleep by …
Movin’ On Up
OK, I’ll admit it. In the first inning I was calling for Wells’ head. I was contemplating what the team would do with him, considering …
Emancipation Proclamation
Key hits from the guys who needed to deliver them most? Check. [Most pleasing was Edgah’s grand slam.] Another exceptional performance by Matt “Send it …
Back to the Future
Hey, it’s only May, right? Right? Not much more I can say other than the Sox had ample opportunity to put this one away, and …
The View From Fourth Place
Things sure are a little colder and darker down here. There are creepy skittering noises from the shadows, and a dank draft chills us to …
Words Fail Me
Read all about it here. Or you could just pay someone to tap your nuts with a hammer.
Americans, Idle
Remember how Kevin Spacey won an Oscar for American Beauty? Dude was so good in the flick, we were able to overlook such follow-up tripe …
How to Dismantle an Atomic Bum
Okay, Red Sox, I have to admit. As much as I love you guys, you weren’t my first choice last night. I had originally planned …
Kevin Millar Has a Time Machine
[With apologies to McSweeney’s] June 9, 1863Brandy Station, Virginia General Robert E. Lee: Men, I know these last few weeks have been hard. But we’ve …
Show Me the Way to Go Home
In San Diego for a conference last week. One of the most gorgeous cities on the planet and I’m confined mostly to sterile hotel conference …
Semantics
I’m torn. I can’t decide if that was more of a debacle or a clusterfuck. Shut down by a 21-year old making his MLB debut. …
Between Innings
As I’ve mentioned before, and will probably continue to mention all year because it is such a great innovation, I have the MLB Extra Innings …
Homeward Bound
The conversation on the mound: Francona: Wow, he really battled today. And when I say battled, I mean sucked. Now I have to sit in …
Edgah!
Slowly, quietly, Edgar Renteria has been showing signs of becoming the player Theo and RSN expected when he put on a Red Sox uniform. Last …
LOB Equals LOSS
Timely hitting. Timely freakin’ hitting. Where did it go? A strong effort by Arroyo, not dominating, but good enough to win on most nights, was …
400…Not Enough
The Red Sox dropped the game and the series, falling to the M’s 5-4, despite Manny’s 400th career homerun. To me, when a player reaches …
Weakness in Seattle
Well that was three hours of my life that I’ll never get back.
The 2005 Red Sox Beards: A Spotter’s Guide
The Cro-Magnon: A throwback to a simpler time, when men roamed the land free from taxation, fast food restaurants, and the threat of a Bad …
Walk (off) This Way
Following the lead of teammate Kevin Millar from the previous night, Jason Varitek launched a two-run, game-winning homerun into the seats at sunny Fenway. If …
Remembrance
One of my sisters knew Bernie Logue, the Red Sox clubhouse cook who died earlier this week, and she attended his wake this evening in …
The Famous Final Scene
Is there anything cooler than the walk-off home run? After a couple of fielding errors by Millar had us screaming for the return of Nick …
All Your A’s Are Belong to Us
Whenever the A’s roll into town, I get the impression that the Sox view ’em in the same way that Spider-Man would view one of …
Found Calm
At la casa de Red, we uphold the sanctity of Mother’s Day. Specifically, we clean up our act, particularly when it comes to watching the …