The latest entry in the long-running series in which Brian Cashman discusses the current state of the New York Yankees. With his headwarmer.
Cashman: I gotta say, Headwarmer, I’m glad I was able to unload Ottavino.
Headwarmer: Yep.
Cashman: And to the Red Sox, no less. Our hated rivals in the East.
Headwarmer: Sure, sure.
Cashman: I mean, it helped us free up some payroll. Everybody loves free payroll. The fans appreciate financial prudence.
Headwarmer: Who the fuck doesn’t love a team that’s good with money?
Cashman: Exactly! Now, of course, I hate to see Ottavino doing so well for the Red Sox. In fact, as I told those reporters, the last thing I wanted to do was put him in the hands of our competitors. But ultimately I’m not afraid to do business with everybody if it serves our purposes.
Headwarmer: Right. And those purposes are…?
Cashman: Well, to win, of course.
Headwarmer: And how’s that workin out for you, Turkey Tits?
Cashman: It’s a long season. I’m sure time will prove me the victor in the Ottavino Affair.
Headwarmer: Well said. Now, would you please put your testicles on the putting green.
Cashman: Is this going to hurt?
Headwarmer: *raises golf club* Yes.
