Clay Buchholz is back tonight. He of the hot wife and hair that looks like the alien symbiote Spider-Man costume will be returning to the mound for the first time since he ate some bad grapes or whatever the hell put him out of commission back in early June.
Will he be the same? Coming out there and hurling fire and beefing up his 9-0 record? Folks, we’ll be lucky if he remembers to put his pants on before hitting the field. I just hope he can keep us in the game long enough to put a hurtin’ on the Rays. Because if there’s one team whose elimination from the postseason I’d be happy to expedite, it’s the Rays.
On the other hand, if Clay does show even a hint of the brilliance he was flashing before his injury? Then I’d open a 24-hour hotline to accept surrender notices from every other AL team. Because at that point, nothing will be stopping us.
Clay, Clay, Clay, Clay, Clay, Clay, Clay, Clay, Clay, Clay, Clay, Clay, Clay, Clay, Clay, Clay, Clay, Clay, Clay, Clay, Clay, Clay, Clay, Clay, Clay, Clay, Clay, Clay, Clay, Clay, Clay, Clay, Clay, Clay, Clay, Clay, Clay, Clay, Clay, Clay, Clay, Clay, Clay, Clay, Clay, Clay, Clay, Clay, Clay, Clay, Clay, Clay, Clay, Clay, Clay, Clay, Clay.
Also, Clay.
