In the biggest non-surprise since finding out American Idol reject William Hung received no professional training, Derek Lowe shit the bed again. Insert here your favorite play on words using Derek’s name; “How Lowe can he go?”, His name is Lowe, his ERA isn’t”, and the list goes on.

So, what’s the story this time? Was he too tired from traveling on an uncomfortable plane? No, they’ve been on a homestand, that can’t be it. I know, too well-rested. No, he’s on his regular rotation. But he likes the red jerseys.. Yeah, yeah, they wore the red jerseys. Got it! The crutch-du-jour must be a blister! Of course, the deadly blister. Couldn’t grip the ball, didn’t get the proper rotation, lost his command, blah, blah, blah.

Watching Lowe’s starts and suffering through the analysis of why he sucked is getting as tedious as listening to Ted Sarandis bitch about a retractable dome stadium. Hey Teddy, how about I whip out my skull saw and make your dome retractable?

On a side note, why did Francona bring in Dinardo with all righty’s or switch-hitters due up? Onward and westward, June is here and so is the always-rough west coast trip. Be prepared for some sleep-deprived ramblings coming your way…