Though it’s a couple days old, this Globe bit on Gabe Kapler reminds us all of just how cool it is to have this guy around.
And I’m not talking about Gabe Kapler the player. I’m talking about Gabe Kapler the Gabe Kapler. Yeah, the guy will make the occasional stellar snag in the outfield and tip one over the wall from time to time, but of all the folks on our 2006 roster [and Kap really doesn’t have a place yet, per se, but the team appears intent on bringing him back], does anyone seem more ecstatic to be putting on a Red Sox jersey? Further, is there anyone on the team — or indeed in all of Major League Baseball — who carries himself more lucidly through media interviews?
Let’s face it, the Hebrew Hammer could be breaking legs in Southie or slipping into an Iron Man costume to keep Communism and Al Qaeda in check. But instead, he channels his energies into helping battered women and snuggling teddy bears. Christ, even the Schill dog admits, “He’s one of my favorite teammates of all time.” Slightly edging out Randy Johnson for that coveted position, I’m guessing.
I say get the Hebrew Hammer to the cloning machine at once [oh, as if they don’t have ’em lined up in the secret bunker under Yawkey Way]. We may not win a s–tload of games, but we’ll be a lock for the World Series of Good Vibes.