The Mets have supposedly offered Pedro three years at $38 million. Do the Sox stand any chance of resigning him? — J.S., Watertown, MA
I’m not really sure. I guess. I’m more of a Cleveland Indians fan myself. So I’d like to see us get him, frankly. If I was a Sox fan, I’d probably say let him go. Once, one of our bass players came to us and said he got a better offer from Foghat. So what were we gonna do? Negotiate? The Trick doesn’t play that. We told him to pack his shit, and he did. Three weeks later, he falls off a fence and breaks both hands. There’s a lesson there, people. Last I heard, he was doing some studio work for The Wiggles.
Can we expect some real bad blood between the Sox and Yankees in 2005? — D.O., Orange, CT
I would think so. It’s kinda like when me and Rick Nielsen got into a scrap with the guys from Styx back in the early ’80s. Now every time our tour buses cross paths, we throw down. And if you were making a list of folks most deserving of a lead pipe beating, tell me that A-Rod wouldn’t be invariably followed by “any or all of the guys from Styx.”
What’s with all the construction going on at Fenway these days? — T.P., Jr., Chelsea, MA
Apparently they’re putting in a bunch of new seats. It will be bigger, no doubt, but, like, it’s no Budokan.
How does the Sox’ signing of Mirabelli affect the Varitek negotiations? — R.B., Lincoln, NH
Like rock musicians, pro athletes have a very finite window of time to stuff their pockets with loot. One minute, you’re on the cover of Billboard and getting propositioned by Downtown Julie Brown. The next, you’re playing a wedding in Bayonne, trying desperately to ignore the drunk who “just wants to hear some Dr. Hook.” I don’t begrudge Varitek for trying to break the bank. That said, I hope his agent gets attacked by a gibbon.
Could the lyrics to your song “Say Goodbye” be a thinly veiled message to people who, no matter how hard they try, can’t seem to get over the fact that the 2004 baseball season has ended, and continue to obsess over every last detail of the playoffs to the point of freeze-framing tapes of the game to try to see the looks on the faces in the stands? — T.M., West Roxbury, MA
Possibly. Why don’t you ask the jerks who run this site.